The Bought Board

The only leaderboard on the internet that admits it is rigged. Everywhere else the order is a mystery you are told to trust. Here it is a receipt: the biggest number wears the crown, everyone can see what it cost, and it lasts exactly until somebody finds $5 more than that.

Yes, it is rigged. That is the entire point.

Nothing on this page was earned. Not the order, not the crown, not the smug little number. Rank is the bid and the bid is printed right next to it. The rest of this site spends 36 chapters proving you cannot buy a search ranking, and this page is not the exception to that, it is the exhibit. Every outbound link is sponsored and nofollowed, so what you are buying is eyeballs, not Google.

The rules, such as they are

• Money is the only metric. Whole US dollars, $5 to $999,999. Biggest number goes on top. There is no algorithm, no quality score and nobody to appeal to.
• The crown costs extra. Taking first place costs at least $5 more than whatever the current leader paid. Matching them is not taking it.
• First come, first crowned. Equal bids keep the order they were placed in, so turning up later with the same money leaves you underneath.
• Climbing is cheap. Submit the same link again and you pay only the difference, because you already paid the rest.
• What gets in: a product site or an X handle. No chat invites, no link shorteners, no adult content. Query strings are stripped, so affiliate URLs quietly stop being affiliate URLs.
• Google is not invited. Every outbound link is rel="sponsored nofollow". You are buying attention on this page, not anything a search engine will count.
• No refunds, no takebacks. Getting outbid is the product working, not the product breaking. If a payment is ever reversed, the rank it bought goes with it.
• One listing per thing. App Store, Play Store and repository links are keyed by their path, so two different apps are two different listings.

Now the awkward part

This is the only ranking on this site with a price tag, and it is here to make a point. Everything else documents one product, ihatepdf.cv, taken from zero to 100K+ users on search alone with nothing spent on ads, and every figure comes from that one dataset. That ranking was not for sale. Nobody's is. See the 100 free guides and 12 free tools.